A Few Questions

[bob6666]

does xander love buffy anymore. do buffy and xander have a chance to be togeter


it some time seem that xander is buffy best friend when she need somethink but when she does it she treat him like he just not that important

[Spike Angelus]

I think they love each other as friends, in a brother/sister way, but I do not think Xander has the same feeling she had for her in season 1. His relationships with Cordy and Anya, and the new one with Renee cover that.
Not counting Faith, cause that was just a one night stand.

[alexa]

I think there's a big chance for Xander and Buffy to finally become a romantic relationship.. and it's much more popular in the fan base then it was. Of course we still have season 9 coming as well, so never really know what's going to eventuate.

[TabulaRasa]

I would have to say that there is no chance. This is purely my opinion of course. I just think that that bridge has been crossed. But then again, no bridge is truly crossed when it comes to the whedonverse.

[Allycat]

I'm with Alexa on this one. I totally see it happening. I think the Batsu-thing was just a one-time type of deal. As for Renee, I strongly believe that she'll turn out to be the traitor, so that should open up Xander's schedule. I was never a fan of this pairing, but I'm totally digging it now.

[Bangelxx]

I don't think theres any chance. Buffy and Xander are friends, and I just can't see them being more.

[Hello Cutie]

Bander could have been adorable a while back, but I'm agreeing with Bangelxx here... its not gonna happen- after everything they've been through, it'd sort of reminds me of incest. :S Not a good image!

[Allycat]

How can you even say that? Sure, they've been through a lot together, but that doesn't make them family. If you do have a partner, you usually go through a lot of big things with them... that doesn't suddenly or gradually turn your relationship incestuous, does it?

Plus, you have to take into account that they've been apart for a year, in between Seasons 7 and 8, so whatever familial bond they had, could have diminished. Being away from someone for such a long time and then coming back, forces you to re-evaluate them.

[NightBird]

I can't see xan and B becoming a couple, xan may have felt that way once but u think those feelings where replaced by the love between friends.

I really hope that 'Rander' happens as i think that they are perfect for each other, she's just as geeky as xan and they look like a nice couple, so i'm praying that R isnt the mole.

I feel really bad for satsu, i mean when things aren't all crazy powerd vamps, asuming she survives anyway, shes going to be heartbroken, she fell for buffy and tbh i think it was bad of buffy to experiment with satsu, as sat had made her feelings know to buffy this issue before, surely in a castle full of girls buffy could have 'experimented' with somebody wasnt in love with her.

[alexa]

Well I was never really a Bander shipper till recently.. I've always been Bangel, well maybe Bander in season 1 for 20mins or so ;)
Their history and bond is what appeals to me actually... plus Xander is looking hot in comic book form.
But I could never get into Cangel for instance, that felt like brother and sister to me.

[palabravampiress]

I think Xander's endgame for Buffy. They DO seem really comfortable with each other, you guys are right. There is this attitude out there that that level of comfort is not conducive to passion or great emotion and that it is somehow incestuous, but I very strongly disagree. Most of the people, including myself, whom I know to be happily married have a very strong friendly/familial bond. Passion is necessary in any romantic relationship, but it's not the most important part of a functional relationship. The friendship/family bond... that's the one that gets you through illnesses and career setbacks and deaths in the family and other long-haul type problems. Xander is already sort of taking on the co-parent role with Dawn, the confidant role with Buffy, the second-in-command role with slayerdom, etc. etc. He seems to be growing into Buffy's partner. Who better for a lover than a partner?

Also, I strongly suspect that Xander will be freed up by the mole. I'm not sure about the Buffy/Satsu thing, but I don't at this point really see it being a big romantic ship. It seems more like experimentation, which actually makes me sort of mad at Buffy. I mean, she knows Satsu loves her. Like someone else said, it's like Spike all over again (only I hope she's at least less violent with this one). That's another thing... I don't think Xander would stand for that. Buffy seems to respect him as an equal. Even the slayers junior seem to respect him and have faith in his experience. I think a Bander relationship would be a lot more healthy and balanced than most of Buffy's other ships... same for Xander, really.

Xander and Buffy have been leaning on each other a lot for all of the little day-to-day stuff and the emotional bonding ever since season 7. I think that once they wrap their minds around the fact that feeling close like that doesn't make sex taboo, they'll be good to go. Actually, rather than being incestuous and icky, I think that close family/friendship relationship has the potential to make the sexual part of the relationship much more satisfying. Think about it. We recently saw some performance anxiety on Buffy's side, right? She enjoyed her romp with Satsu, but judging by her comments afterward, she was also passive and insecure and unsure of herself. That's not the case when you are already close to someone before you start a sexual relationship with that person. In the already close situation, you have fewer inhibitions, so you feel free to communicate your needs and desires... which results in having them met as well as having confidence that you have met the needs and desires of the other party. So the result is a lack of panicked declarations of "but I didn't do enough things!"

So, basically, I am pretty firmly in the Bander camp. I think they could work really well on all levels. Plus hey! No need for that embarrassing sexual past talk, since they both already know!

[Allycat]

Wow, palabravampires, you just said just about everything I think about this topic. The one small addition I feel I have to make is that Satsu could feel guilty for sleeping with Buffy too. Buffy's obviously lonely and by using the situation to sleep with Satsu, Buffy could feel forced into a relationship with her. Or at least, to be more affectionate toward Satsu than she originally was. Anyway, that's a different discussion.

[white avenger]

The really bad thing about having any sort of romantic relationship between Buffy and Xander is that neither of them seem to have much luck with any kind of long term relationship. Granted, Buffy had Angel for three seasons before he left her, and Xander had Anya for about that much time before they split up, but the end result is the same. Neither one seems to be able to hold onto a partner. If things go according to their usual pattern, an affair with Buffy would either be a death knell or an exit from the series for Xander.

[palabravampiress]

^ GOOD point.

That's why I think they're "endgame." I don't think Buffy/Xander will happen until near the end of the series. That way, there won't be time for Joss to torture us by screwing it up so badly that Xander has to leave the show and transfer over to Hell A, other wise known as the holding pen for Buffy's exes. lol. I really want Joss to give us at least one happy ending... and no surprise, last-minute, "he ain't comin'" type of deaths, either! Do you hear me, Joss?! lol.

[Allycat]

The really bad thing about having any sort of romantic relationship between Buffy and Xander is that neither of them seem to have much luck with any kind of long term relationship. Granted, Buffy had Angel for three seasons before he left her, and Xander had Anya for about that much time before they split up, but the end result is the same. Neither one seems to be able to hold onto a partner. If things go according to their usual pattern, an affair with Buffy would either be a death knell or an exit from the series for Xander.

I completely disagree. It's entirely normal for people between ages 16-24 (that's how old they are in S8, right?) to go through a series of relationships before finding the right person. I wouldn't call just that bad luck. I call not being able to hold onto a partner never having a relationship that lasts more than three months at most. Xander had two long-term relationships; Cordelia (about a year) and Anya (two-and-a-half years) and Buffy had Angel (2 years off-and-on) and Riley (1 year) (Spike's not really a conventional relationship. Those are pretty normal score for people of that age.

I mean, so far all my relationships have ended. Does that mean me and my current girlfriend are gonna split up too? I don't think so. I mean, could be... but could be we'll grow old together... People learn from every failed relationship, I'm assuming fictional characters do too; this makes them better equipped to handle future relationships.

[Spike Angelus]

I completely disagree. It's entirely normal for people between ages 16-24 (that's how old they are in S8, right?) to go through a series of relationships before finding the right person. I wouldn't call just that bad luck. I call not being able to hold onto a partner never having a relationship that lasts more than three months at most. Xander had two long-term relationships; Cordelia (about a year) and Anya (two-and-a-half years) and Buffy had Angel (2 years off-and-on) and Riley (1 year) (Spike's not really a conventional relationship. Those are pretty normal score for people of that age.

I mean, so far all my relationships have ended. Does that mean me and my current girlfriend are gonna split up too? I don't think so. I mean, could be... but could be we'll grow old together... People learn from every failed relationship, I'm assuming fictional characters do too; this makes them better equipped to handle future relationships.

I agree. I went though so many GF's in that time span that my friends would take bets on how long it lasted.

[Edmund Blackadder]

The really bad thing about having any sort of romantic relationship between Buffy and Xander is that neither of them seem to have much luck with any kind of long term relationship. Granted, Buffy had Angel for three seasons before he left her, and Xander had Anya for about that much time before they split up, but the end result is the same. Neither one seems to be able to hold onto a partner. If things go according to their usual pattern, an affair with Buffy would either be a death knell or an exit from the series for Xander.

OR maybe the fact that neither has had much luck when it comes to the opposite sex shows that they a) have enough relationship no no's between them to make it work b) were meant to be together in the end so other relationships were never meant to work c) be the breaking of their relationship curse?

I don't particularly care either way however, alot of people just go along with what Joss says so if Xander and Buffy get it together and it works, you'll all be like 'yay, Bander is great. I didn't like the idea at first but it grew on me because Joss told me it would'.

[Keanoite]

OR maybe the fact that neither has had much luck when it comes to the opposite sex shows that they a) have enough relationship no no's between them to make it work b) were meant to be together in the end so other relationships were never meant to work c) be the breaking of their relationship curse?

I don't particularly care either way however, alot of people just go along with what Joss says so if Xander and Buffy get it together and it works, you'll all be like 'yay, Bander is great. I didn't like the idea at first but it grew on me because Joss told me it would'.

I can pretty much garuntee I will NOT be one of those people. I'll create holy murder...ok maybe not but expect a thread whinging about it;)

[Edmund Blackadder]

I can pretty much garuntee I will NOT be one of those people. I'll create holy murder...ok maybe not but expect a thread whinging about it;)

I can guarantee that IF Joss does it, you'll be 'won' over and love it and this thread will bite you in the ass:)

[Keanoite]

I can guarantee that IF Joss does it, you'll be 'won' over and love it and this thread will bite you in the ass:)

I smell a bet coming on...

[Edmund Blackadder]

I smell a bet coming on...

Me too.

I bet you $100 Trillion Dollars!

OR how about the loser buys the winner a coke?

[Keanoite]

Me too.

I bet you $100 Trillion Dollars!

OR how about the loser buys the winner a coke?

Coke? I thought you'd be more hardcore than that!

OK..coke it is...

I bet you a coke that if Bander actually happens I will NOT fall at the feet of Joss Whedon and thank him for being so God damned amazing for making me like something I really hate

Deal?

[Edmund Blackadder]

Coke? I thought you'd be more hardcore than that!

OK..coke it is...

I bet you a coke that if Bander actually happens I will NOT fall at the feet of Joss Whedon and thank him for being so God damned amazing for making me like something I really hate

Deal?

Dealio!

I would ask that mine is a Diet Cherry Coke when I win though, I don't like Diets generally, but the diet Cherry is really good!

[Keanoite]

Dealio!

I would ask that mine is a Diet Cherry Coke when I win though, I don't like Diets generally, but the diet Cherry is really good!

Little over-confident aren't we?

Since thats the case MY victory drink will be a voldka and coke...anything else is just plain boring!

[Edmund Blackadder]

Little over-confident aren't we?

Since thats the case MY victory drink will be a voldka and coke...anything else is just plain boring!

No no - just confident.

I accept your drink of choice.

I have a bottle of Black Cherry Vodka with a hint of Vanilla, cost me £50, I'll gladly poor you a drink of that with Coke, actually does go well with Diet Cherry Coke (I swear I am not a Cherry Coke salesman) - You win, you can have a drink on me!

[alexa]

No one 'makes me' like something I dislike. I have this thing called free will, so I can change my mind whenever I want to based on my own observations and desires. I'd use this argument Keanoite when you jump on magnificence that is the Bander ship ;) lol.

[white avenger]

I completely disagree. It's entirely normal for people between ages 16-24 (that's how old they are in S8, right?) to go through a series of relationships before finding the right person. I wouldn't call just that bad luck. I call not being able to hold onto a partner never having a relationship that lasts more than three months at most. Xander had two long-term relationships; Cordelia (about a year) and Anya (two-and-a-half years) and Buffy had Angel (2 years off-and-on) and Riley (1 year) (Spike's not really a conventional relationship. Those are pretty normal score for people of that age.

I mean, so far all my relationships have ended. Does that mean me and my current girlfriend are gonna split up too? I don't think so. I mean, could be... but could be we'll grow old together... People learn from every failed relationship, I'm assuming fictional characters do too; this makes them better equipped to handle future relationships.


I have no problem with any of that, what I meant was that all of the "exes" on the show tend to leave or die. Personally, I believe that if Joss ever permanently puts an end to the Buffy saga, the surviving "original" stars (Buffy, Willow, Giles, and Xander) will settle down with someone we have not currently met, No Bangel, no Spuffy, no Killow (?), no...well, maybe Xangel, they seem so made for each other.

[Edmund Blackadder]

No one 'makes me' like something I dislike. I have this thing called free will, so I can change my mind whenever I want to based on my own observations and desires. I'd use this argument Keanoite when you jump on magnificence that is the Bander ship ;) lol.

And every other person who is that kind of person, claiming they like something because they like it NOT because Joss tells them they like it, will argue they have 'free will'.

I've seen many times over the years ardent fans of one thing change their minds when they are told something.

I don't mean everyone, but alot - though I do expect Keanoite to break and fall in love with Bander if it happens.