Searching For Love (After Series Finale, Spuffy)

[Weeza]

Email: Weeza25@hotmail.com AOL Messenger: AriesGambler

Disclaimer: None of these Characters are mine. Joss Whedon brilliantly created them. I'm only borrowing them. I hope I do his characters justice.

Summary: Takes place after the Series Finale. Buffy is searching for closure and goes on a hunt to find it. She ends up getting more than she bargains for. Massively Spuffy!!

Please Review!! All comments and suggestions are really appreciated. I love to see who is reading my stories and what you think of them. Please make me happy and leave your opinion.

Buffy walked down the dark alleyway with that feeling in the pit of her stomach that she always had when she felt Spike was near. She kept walking in whatever direction made that feeling grow. She didn't know why she was doing it. It was impossible right? Spike was gone. He was dead. Sunlight had poured from his soul and dusted hundreds of ubervamps on the spot. She knew he wouldn't survive that. He couldn't survive that. All of Sunnydale was sucked into oblivion and he went crumbling down with it. Spike couldn't be any more than a pile of ashes now so why did she feel his presence so strongly?

She continued to follow that feeling until she rounded the corner and started to see light at the end of the tunnel. The end of the alleyway was near and she could see the sunlight that surrounded the city, stores and people. Being in the alleyway was like night and day and her eyes were trying to adjust to the sudden brightness of her destination.

Buffy heard a rustling sound come from behind a green dumpster at the end of the alleyway. It caught her by surprise and she backed up against the brick wall just watching and waiting to discover what the sound was. She heard footsteps and suddenly saw a male body come into view. It was still too dark and she couldn't make out his face.

She heard the flick of a lighter and the flame rose until the glow surrounded the man's face. As he lit his cigarette the flame allowed enough light for her to make out who it was. Buffy gasped and her heartbeat sped its pace. Her breath caught in her throat and she was too shocked to form words. She stayed frozen up against the wall just waiting for his next move.

He started to walk toward the light while she unsuccessfully attempted to yell out his name. He walked right into the sunlight and she wanted to scream. She waited for him to burst into flame and burn up in front of her eyes. Instead what she saw shocked her even more. He stood in the sun with his eyes closed as if he were taking it in for the first time and savoring it as if it were his last.

The sun lit up his face like she'd never thought she'd see it. His cheekbones became even more prominent and his bleached blonde hair seemed even brighter. His dark eyelashes lay on his pale cheeks as he just let himself soak up the warmth of the sun. He finally opened his eyes, which were such a brilliant shade of blue that she could see the color from where she was standing. Buffy so badly wanted to call out his name but the words still wouldn't come.

He started walking down the street and walked right out of her view. Her legs felt like jelly and she was trying to muster up the strength to chase after him. She started walking forward on wobbly legs and once she caught her balance, she started to run until she too was surrounded in sunlight. She squinted her eyes until they adjusted to her surroundings. Her eyes traveled in the direction she saw him go but she didn't see him anywhere. She spun around and looked in every direction but there was absolutely no sign of him. She hadn't moved fast enough and now she had lost him.

Buffy turned to the left and started running in the direction she saw him travel. She carefully took in her surroundings as she ran to make sure she didn't miss him. She started to panic when she still didn't see him. It was as if he had disappeared.

"Spike!" Buffy yelled as she finally found her voice again.

"Spike!"

"Buffy?"

"Buffy!"

Buffy felt hands grasping at her shoulders and strong hands starting to shake her.

"Buffy, wake up!"

Buffy sat up and saw Xander standing before her with his hands still grasping at her shoulders. It took a moment for her brain to comprehend the difference between her dream world and her reality.

She finally realized that she was in her bed surrounded by comforters and fluffy pillows. She looked around and observed her new bedroom as if seeing it for the first time.

Xander, Willow, Dawn and Buffy were now residing in a house together. They found a nice place in L. A. and decided to split the rent. They were all terrified of where their lives were headed after Sunnydale was destroyed but luckily they found jobs in the city and went on to resume somewhat of a normal life.

Buffy looked up to see Xander's worried expression.

"Buffy are you all right? I think you were having a nightmare."

"I..." Buffy started, her brow furrowed with confusion. "Uh, no. It wasn't a nightmare. Not really. Not until the end."

Xander looked at her and waited to hear about the dream but instead she just continued to sit up and blankly stare forward.

"Buffy? Are you sure you're ok." Xander asked as he rubbed her shoulder.

Buffy finally looked up at Xander in acknowledgement. "Can you bring the rest of the gang in here please?"

"Buffy, it's three o'clock in the morning. Everyone is sleeping."

"Please Xander." She pleaded with her eyes. "It's important."

Xander nodded and left the room to wake up Willow and Dawn. They both walked sleepily with Xander toward Buffy's bedroom. Dawn stopped them ten feet before reaching Buffy's door.

"Xander, what's going on? Why is Buffy having you wake us up in the middle of the night?"

"She had a bad dream Dawnie. She wanted to talk to all of us."

Dawn's eyes widened and grabbed his arm. "Oh God! Is it a slayer dream? Are we all in trouble?"

"There's only one way to find out." Xander replied and continued toward Buffy's room.

They walked through her bedroom door to find Buffy sitting on the edge of her bed in jeans and a T-shirt.

"Planning on going somewhere Buff? Xander questioned.

"Uh, yeah." Buffy answered quickly. "Sit down. There is something I need to talk to you about."

Dawn and Willow sat on the bed next to Buffy. Xander took a seat in the comfy chair next to the bed. They all stared at Buffy, intently waiting for an explanation.

"I had a dream that Spike was alive." Buffy announced. "He was really alive. He was able to walk in the sun. But at the end of the dream he disappeared. I couldn't find him. I didn't move fast enough." She looked down at her hands, as if ashamed that she wasn't able to locate him.

Confused glances were exchanged between Xander, Willow and Dawn. They couldn't figure out how this could be considered an emergency.

"Buffy." Willow spoke first. "It was only a dream. It's nothing to worry about."

Buffy looked up at willow. "That's just it. I don't think it was just a dream."

"What do you mean Buffy?" Dawn spoke up. "Are you saying you think this was some sort of slayer dream? You think it's a look into the future?"

"Not exactly." Buffy answered. "I think Spike is still alive and I need to find him."

"Buffy, don't you think you're jumping the gun just a bit." Xander added, leaning forward on his chair. "Not all of your dreams are slayer dreams. It could mean nothing."

"Maybe." Buffy admitted. "But it could also mean something."

"You probably just miss him Buffy." Willow suggested. "Dreams often tap into your wishes and fears. Remember that old saying "A dream is a wish your heart makes?" That's probably all it is."

"I guess." Buffy sighed heavily. "But I have to know for sure."

"All of Sunnydale was destroyed. The chance that Spike is still alive is slim to none." Xander said.

"Slim to none." Buffy repeated. "Which means there could be a slim chance that I am right. Spike could be out there somewhere. If he is, I have to find him. He has to know."

"Know what Buffy?" Willow asked, placing a hand gently over hers.

"That I love him." Buffy admitted slowly. Those words finally spoken to her friends gave her more of a relief than she ever could have imagined.

"I told him in the end, right before I left him. But he didn't believe me. I shouldn't have waited so long to let him know." Buffy continued.

"I'm sure he knew Buffy." Willow responded. "If all of us knew how you felt then I'm sure he did too."

"You knew?" Buffy asked with a stunned expression.

"Well, yeah." Willow said, glancing at Dawn and Xander. "We could see how you two were with each other. You were always so concerned about him. It was kind of obvious."

"It was?" Buffy asked, looking at Xander and Dawn for confirmation. They both nodded at Buffy in agreement.

"Well, that's probably it then Buff." Xander offered. "Your dream was all about closure. It's still bothering you that he didn't believe you. I'm sure there's nothing more to it than that."

"But what if there is?" Buffy sighed again in frustration.

"You can't go out there with nothing to go on." Dawn reasoned. "How are you going to find someone you are not even sure exists anymore?"

"I don't know." Buffy admitted. "But I have to try."

Buffy grabbed her coat and walked toward the front door with her friends trailing behind her. She turned the knob, opened the door halfway and turned back to her friends before she walked out.

"Don't wait up." Buffy said, before closing the door behind her.

To Be Continued...

[Magui]

well,i am not spuffy shipper,but it is an interesting story.continue ;)

[Weeza]

Buffy roamed the streets in the black of night suddenly realizing that she had absolutely no plan. Dawn was right. How was she going to find someone she wasn't even sure existed anymore without any leads? It's been six months since Spike sacrificed himself to save the world. What if her dream was only to give her a sense of closure? She couldn't think like that though. She wasn't about to start doubting herself now. It wasn't just the dream that was pushing her to do this. She had that gut instinct that something wasn't quite right. She was never one to just sit around and do nothing.

She thought back to the time when she had to investigate to find whether or not Spike was evil again. The first thing she did was look around in clubs or bars and ask the bouncers if they had seen him. It seemed like a logical place to start this time around too. There weren't a lot of places open in the middle of the night but she knew she wouldn't be able to rest until she found one.

She spotted a bar that was open 24 hours. She walked inside to find that it was a lot more crowded than she had suspected it to be. She walked over to the bar and took a seat. She wanted to see if she could get any information from the bartender. They were the ones who usually knew everything that went on with the people who come in and out of the bar on a regular basis.

"What can I get for you sweetie?" The bartender asked with his handsomest of smiles.

"Uh, actually, I just came here to see if I could get some information."

"All right. What can I do for you?" The bartender inquired, never losing his smile.

"I'm looking for someone. Have you seen or heard anything about a guy with bleach blond hair possibly wearing all black with cheekbones from heaven? Buffy asked Hopefully. "He sort of has that Billy Idol look."

"Yeah! I've seen a guy who could fit that description."

"You have?" Buffy eyes lit up.

"Yeah. He's sitting right over there." The bartender pointed to a table toward the back.

Buffy looked quickly to where a man with bleached hair and a leather jacket was sitting all by himself. She still couldn't make him out very well. Suddenly, as if she willed him to do so, he stood up and started to make his way toward the bar. To her disappointment, his face was hidden by shadows. As he got closer she held her breath and silently wished for a miracle but soon she realized that it was definitely not Spike. He was apparently much older. He walked past her and the bar and walked out into the night.

"So, was that who you were looking for?" The bartender interrupted her feelings of disappointment.

"No. That definitely wasn't him." Buffy answered. "Although, I think that guy actually WAS Billy Idol."

The bartender chuckled. "I think you're right. I'm just sorry I couldn't be more of a help."

"It's ok." Buffy said, forcing a smile. "I'll just keep on looking. I should have known that finding him in the first place I looked was too good to be true. Thanks anyway."

Buffy continued her search. She stopped at every bar and club that was open at such an ungodly hour. After 5 stops and 13 security guards later, the sun started to rise and Buffy decided to head home.

She had made absolutely no progress and hated the fact that she had to return home just to announce that she had found nothing. She couldn't bare the sympathetic looks on her friend's faces and the knowledge that every one of them thought what she was doing was completely crazy.

An idea suddenly struck her and she was stunned she hadn't thought of it before. She now knew what she needed to do.

"Willow?" Buffy called as she opened the door to their apartment.

"Buffy! You're back!" Willow greeted happily. "So, How did it go?"

"Not so good." Buffy admitted. "But that's where you come in." Willow sprinkled her magical concoction into a circle and sat in the middle of it. She had a world map in front of her, knowing that if Spike was alive, he could be just about anywhere. Buffy watched as Willow quietly chanted to herself with her eyes closed and a look of intensity on her face.

After several minutes, a bright florescent light illuminated the map but faded almost as quickly as it appeared. Willow let out an exaggerated sigh and she looked up at Buffy with a frown.

"What? What's wrong?" Buffy asked, panic apparent in her voice.

"It's not working Buffy. I'm sorry."

"Well, what does that mean? He's really not alive? My dream really was just a dream?" Buffy asked, tears forming in her eyes.

"Not exactly. I've done this kind of locator spell before and I'm getting a different vibe from this one. Something seems to be disrupting the spell. It's kind of like, if he is alive, he doesn't want to be found. I can't be certain but it feels like someone is trying to hide something. I'm so sorry Buffy. There's really nothing else that I can do." Willow bit her lip as she looked at her friend with the broken heart.

Buffy tossed and turned in her bed wondering where she went wrong. She knew something wasn't right. She just felt it. There had to be more to it than she was seeing. She refused to believe that she was losing her mind. This was much more than just missing him or wanting him to know how she really feels. They had a connection. She could feel it in her heart. She could feel it in her soul. She was missing something. She just had to find it.

"Buffy."

"Buffy."

Buffy opened her sleepy eyes to a deep soothing voice calling out her name. She sat up slightly to see Spike standing at the foot of her bed. The bright light of the moon was shining behind him, making him look like an angel.

She bolted upright and tried to settle her heart that was beating out of her chest.

"Spike? Please tell me it's really you."

"It's me, luv." Spike took a step toward her. "I feel like I've been waiting forever to see you again."

Buffy started breathing rapidly but when he sat down on the bed next to her, she could swear she stopped breathing completely. She looked into his eyes and his hand covered hers. He rubbed the top of her hand three times in slow circles before traveling up her arm. Light as a feather, his fingers reached her shoulder and ran up her neck. He touched her cheek and she closed her eyes feeling each and every caress with the greatest intensity.

Buffy opened her eyes and looked right into Spike's. "I'm glad you're here."

"So am I." Spike said in a whisper. "Too bad this isn't real."

"What?" Buffy asked with desperate fear in her voice.

"Buffy, you have to find me." Spike begged her.

"How? I don't know what to do. Tell me where you are." Buffy pleaded.

Spike wrapped his arms around her in a gentle embrace. Buffy held on tightly, never wanting to let go. Spike started to pull away but Buffy resisted. He gently rubbed her back before pulling back from her far enough to place a soft kiss on her forehead.

"Someone is keeping me from you, luv. If you find them, you'll find me." Spike slipped an arm around her waist and Buffy laid her head on his shoulder.

"Who is it, Spike? Who's keeping us apart?" Buffy's head left his shoulder and her eyes met his again.

"You have to figure it out, Buffy. You have to find me. Please find me. I can't live without you."

Spike slowly started fading away. Buffy desperately tried to keep a hold on him.

"Please don't leave me." Buffy said, trying to keep a grip on his arms.

Spike vanished and Buffy felt an enormous emptiness fill her entire being.

She opened her eyes and realized that she was still laying down, surrounded by her down comforter. It was just another dream but every second of it felt entirely real. She felt safe and warm as if he still had his arms around her.

She made up her mind then and there. Nothing was going to stop her from finding him. She believed with all her heart that he was out there somewhere. She didn't care if every person in the world thought she was delusional. She wasn't going to rest until he was back in her arms.

A lone tear rolled down her cheek. She spoke quietly to herself and to the heavens above, hoping someone out there would hear her.

"I miss you Spike and I will find you." She said as more tears rolled down her flushed cheeks. "I promise you, I'll find you if it's the last thing I do."

To Be Continued....

[Weeza]

Buffy lazily pushed the eggs around on her plate as she attempted to keep her eyes open. She couldn't fall back asleep after seeing Spike in her dream. She couldn't get her mind off of him. She kept wondering who it could be that she was supposed to be looking for. Who could possibly be keeping Spike from her? She wished the dream could have given her more information. The information she did get was just making her crazy with worry and was getting her nowhere.

Xander walked in and popped some toast into the toaster. He sat down across from Buffy and eyed her quizzically.

"Buffy, you look awful!" Xander exclaimed.

She looked up at him with an incredulous look on her face.

"Thanks!" Buffy smiled, her voice dripping with sarcasm.

"Sorry Buff, but you look like you haven't slept in days. I hope you haven't been spending all your time trying to look for Captain Peroxide."

Xander stood up to grab his toast and a knife to butter it. While his back was turned Buffy rolled her eyes and let out a dramatic sigh. Xander obviously missed the eye roll but the sigh didn't get past him.

Xander turned and furrowed his brow. "What's wrong?"

Buffy got up and stood in front of him. "How can you ask me that? You really have no idea what I've been going through in the past couple of days do you?"

"Buffy, it was just a dream!"

Her eyes widened. "It wasn't just a dream!"

"Well, I haven't seen any evidence to the contrary!" Xander argued.

"No, I haven't found anything yet but I plan to keep trying. Thanks for all of your help by the way." More sarcasm dripping from her voice.

"Maybe I haven't been more of a help because I have more sense than to waste my time looking for a dead man!" Xander screamed.

Buffy's eyes filled with rage and she raised her palm, slapping Xander hard across the face.

Xander's head whipped back and he looked at her as his hand rose to cover up the redness from her slap.

Buffy's eyes turned from rage to shock as she has realized what she'd done.

"Xander I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to.."

"Buffy, what is wrong with you. You are being ridiculous!" Xander interrupted.

"How could you say that to me? You wouldn't even be here if it weren't for Spike! Nobody would! The only reason Sunnydale was the only place destroyed was because Spike cared enough to die for the rest of the world! He cared enough to die for me, for my happiness! He knew this was the only chance I had to live a normal life. He gave me the greatest gift of all and I will always love him for that. I refuse to turn my back on him!" Buffy exclaimed with dozens of tears now rolling down her cheeks.

Xander frowned. "I'm sorry. I didn't realize this was that important to you." He walked toward Buffy and put his arms around her.

"Well, what would you have done if I had a dream about Anya like that? Would you have told me to just forget about it? Would you have just passed it off as just another dumb dream or would you have wanted to follow up on it?" Buffy asked, wiping her tear soaked face.

"You're right. I've been a jerk. If it were Anya, if there was any chance at all that she might still be alive, I would have gone to any lengths to find her." Xander admitted. "I guess I'm just so used to hating the guy that it's like a second nature to me. But I will always to grateful for what he did. I guess he wasn't so bad after all."

"Get some rest Buffy." Xander continued. "I'm going to go out and see if I can find out anything for you.

"Thanks Xander." Buffy smiled.

Buffy went back to the table to try and eat at least some of her breakfast, which was probably cold by now. She took a few bites of her eggs and ate a slice of toast when she felt herself starting to doze off again. She rested her head in her hand intending to rest her eyes for a few moments.

"Make sure you finish your breakfast, honey. You've got to start eating right."

Buffy picked up her head to see her mother standing beside her.

"Mom?" Buffy asked, looking around, silently praying that someone else would show up to witness this.

"You have to keep up your strength." Joyce said with a smile. "And dear, when you find Spike make sure you make him a nice cup of hot chocolate with those tiny marshmallows he loves so much. Make sure he knows it's from me."

"I will, Mom." Buffy responded. "Mom? Do you know where Spike is?"

"Of course I do, don't be silly. You will find out soon enough. Don't worry. The answers will come as soon as you stop looking." Joyce said, placing a loose strand of hair behind Buffy's ear.

"What do you mean?" Buffy asked.

"You are wasting too much energy on something that is right in front of your nose, Buffy. You don't have to go on searching anymore. Wait for your sign and the answers will come to you." Joyce bent over, gave Buffy a quick hug, then vanished into thin air.

Buffy felt something cold and squishy on her face. "Ewww!!" Buffy groaned as she woke up with her face in her breakfast. She took a napkin and wiped the egg off of her face.

Later that day Buffy had the gang gather around the living room for a Spike update. "Here's the deal." Buffy began. "I had a couple more dreams that have been fairly helpful. Last night, Spike was in my dream, begging me to find him. He said that someone was keeping him from me, I just had to find out who."

"Why didn't you tell me about that this morning Buff? Xander asked.

"We were too busy yelling at each other. It slipped my mind."

"Oh yeah." Xander said, guiltily bowing his head.

"You guys had a fight?" Dawn asked.

"Never mind that Dawnie. It's not a big deal. Everything is fine now." Buffy said. "Anyway, this morning I had another dream, this time with my mother."

"Mom?" Dawn's eyes lit up.

"Yeah." Buffy said, smiling at Dawn. "It was really strange. She mentioned Spike so I asked if she knew where he was. She said she did and that I would find out soon. She said I would get answers when I stopped looking. Then she told me to wait for a sign and the answers would come to me."

"So what does that mean? What do we do now? Willow asked.

"Nothing." Buffy said simply.

"Nothing? Dawn asked.

"Yeah. Mom has never let me down and if she tells me to stop looking then that is what I'm going to do." Buffy said with a nod. "We will just go on like we normally would."

"Ooh! Let's go shopping!" Willow suggested.

"Ugh! Shopping?" Xander whined.

"Don't worry Xander. We can stop somewhere so you can buy those comic books you still love so much." Willow said, grabbing her jacket.

"I don't know what you're talking about." Xander lied. "But I guess I could stop at a hardware store for something manly, like a power drill."

"Whatever you say, Xander." Willow smirked.

Buffy, Willow, Xander, and Dawn walked down the street with arms full of shopping bags. The girls had naturally bought a ton of clothes and Xander carried his huge paper hardware store bag filled with power tools. Xander snuck away for a little while leaving the girls to believe that he had bought some comics on the sly and hidden them in his hardware bag. He'd never admit it though, so they planned on snooping later.

They walked by a store and Buffy stopped dead in her tracks. Above the door was a huge sign. It showed a large fountain pen and next to it said "William's Books."

They gang had gone ahead, not realizing that Buffy had stopped. Willow noticed Buffy was gone and turned around to find her staring at the sign.

"What is it, Buffy?" Willow asked.

"My sign." Buffy answered and entered the bookstore.

Buffy walked around checking out different parts of the store while her friends lingered around the magazines. She heard some girls giggling in the isle next to her and couldn't help but overhear their conversation.

"He was so hot!" A teenage girl's voice said. "He was totally like my night in shining armor! My psycho ex-boyfriend was stalking me and when I told him to get lost, he started getting rough with me. That is when that total hottie showed up and kicked his ass!"

"Wow!" The girl's friend exclaimed. "What did he look like? Are you gonna see him again?"

"He had bleach blonde hair. He looked like a real bad ass. He wore black leather and had the most amazing pair of blue eyes I have ever seen!"

"Excuse me." Buffy interrupted from isle opposite the two girls. "I couldn't but overhearing. Could you possibly tell me where I could find this mystery man you were just talking about. I might know him. I've been looking all over for him."

"Haven't we all?" The girl mumbled to herself. "He gave me a business card or something and then he just took off." She said while fishing through her purse to find it. "Oh! Here it is!" It says "Angel Investigations." The girl looked up at Buffy and smiled.

Buffy went pale with shock as she looked at the girl. Her mouth fluttered open and closed, not knowing what to say.

"Are you ok." The girl asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine." Buffy answered flatly. "Thanks."

Buffy rushed over to her friends and they all looked toward her sensing that something was wrong.

"Guys, I'm gonna take off." Buffy said before any of her friends got the chance to ask her what was wrong. "There's somewhere I have to be."

"Where are you going, Buffy?" Dawn asked.

"To visit my Ex!" Buffy exclaimed as she ran out of the store.

To Be Continued....

[Magui]

Keep it comming ;)

[Angelic]

WOW! My god your good!
*takes Storyteller Award out of sig and hands to you*
MORE MORE MORE MORE!
PLEASE MORE!

[Weeza]

Buffy had never driven so fast in her life. Unfortunately her driving skills left a lot to be desired and along the way she was close to hitting two squirrels, an old man with a cane trying to cross the road, a dog and a parking meter. She had hoped that her friends wouldn't be too upset with her for just leaving them there and taking the car but, knew they weren't too far from home so they would be all right. She just couldn't bring herself to stick around and explain everything that had just happened. She was too shaken at the moment and knew if she didn't get out of that store and run over to Angel's as soon as humanly possible, she would simply burst.

She sped into the driveway of the hotel and screeched to a halt. Preparing to go inside and meet her fate, she pulled the keys out of the ignition. A sudden feeling of panic stopped her and she froze still seated behind the wheel. Her heart started racing and she felt as if she could barely breathe, suddenly realizing she had no idea what she was doing. What if Spike wasn't even here? What if he was? What would she do? What would she say? But it was the biggest question of all that made her finally step out of her car. Why was she never told that Spike was still alive? She wondered who had kept him from her and why. She wondered if Spike even wanted to see her. Maybe him begging her to be found in her dream was just a fluke.

"There's only one way to find out." She whispered to herself as an answer to about a dozen questions still floating in her mind.

Buffy took so many deep breaths before reaching the door that she thought she would pass out. Her hands were shaking. Her head was spinning. Her life was about to change dramatically in a matter of minutes either for the worse or for the better. Not knowing was just about killing her and she finally opened the door and stepped into the lobby.

The lobby looked empty. There was no one in sight and no sound that would make her think anyone was there at all. She walked up to the front desk and peered into Angel's office, which was behind it and slightly off to the side. He was sitting at his desk quietly working.

Buffy cleared her throat to get his attention and he finally looked up at her. He instantly smiled at her but then his smile was quickly lost and replaced with wide eyes and fear. All it took was that one expression on his face to let her know that he was definitely hiding something.

Angel walked up to Buffy, the smile returning to his face. "Buffy! What are you doing here?"

"I just thought I'd stop by. I wanted to say hello and see how things were going." Buffy said, deciding to play it cool.

"Everything is great." Angel said quickly. "I'm glad you stopped by. I really am, but it's not really a great time. I'm working on something mighty important."

"Anything I can help with?" Buffy asked, her eyes searching the area around her.

"Uh, no. I really don't need any help with it. Maybe we could get together in a few days. We could meet up somewhere." Angel started to get shifty and his eyes traveled up toward the second floor.

Buffy's eyes followed the direction of his but quickly traveled back to his face. "Are you trying to get rid of me?"

"No, of course not. I just thought it would be better to get together when I had a little more time."

Angel walked over to the door and opened it, hoping Buffy would get the hint and leave.

There stood Angel staring at Buffy, holding an open door and waiting for her to walk through it. Slowly, she made her way toward him. When she got closer to the door he backed off a little. Heading for the door, Buffy gave one last look at Angel and thought she saw him breathe a sigh of relief at the idea of her leaving. Instead of crossing the threshold, she grabbed the door, closed it, leaned back against it and remained inside.

Buffy looked up at him seeing confusion in his eyes accompanied by a bit of panic. She finally decided to cut the crap and get right to the point.

"So, where is he?" Buffy asked, pursing her lips in anger.

"Where is who?"

Buffy sighed and rolled her eyes. "Spike. That's who."

"Buffy, what are you talking about? Spike died in the last apocalyptic scare. Have you lost your memory again?"

"Don't play dumb." Buffy snapped.

"I'm not playing.."

"DON'T lie to me!" Buffy angrily interrupted. "I know he's here."

"Buffy, I swear.." Angel started but was interrupted by the sound of clanging metal.

"Stupid sodding plumbing! Doesn't anything work in his place?" Spike appeared at the top of the stairs holding a wrench. "I don't know why I have to fix every bloody thing around here." Spike started descending the stairs completely oblivious to what was going on around him. "I expected to be treated like Mr. Fix-it by Xander but I thought you knew I could be more useful than that. I'd like to get into the fight. Shake things up a bit but no, instead you have me playing the role of the bloody Irish Plumber."

As Spike reached the bottom of the stairs he finally saw that Angel wasn't alone. He saw Buffy standing there, staring at him as if she'd never seen him before.

A sudden gentleness appeared in Spike's eyes as he tilted his head and assessed the situation.

Buffy simply stared at Spike, who was wearing his traditional black jeans and T-shirt. She was surprised to find that even though she came here expecting to see him, it didn't do anything to lessen the shock of him actually standing in front of her.

She suddenly got very nervous and had to look away from Spike for a while to regain her composure. She looked at Angel instead, with venom in her eyes.

"So, how long has he been here?" She asked with a clenched jaw.

"Not too long." Angel answered shortly.

"How long?" Buffy repeated in a partial yell, getting very impatient.

"Three months." Angel answered, looking down at his shoes.

"Three months." Buffy stated in a huff, flailing her arms dramatically. "He's been here all that time and you couldn't even let me know! It's not as if I hadn't talked to you since then."

"Wait a second." Spike chimed in. "You said you called her! You said you told her about me!" He looked at Buffy, then pointed at Angel. "He said he called you!" He repeated, wanting badly to convince Buffy that this wasn't his fault.

"Why didn't YOU call me?" Buffy finally spoke to Spike.

"Angel here said he thought it would be better if you heard it from him, less of a shock and all. He made it sound like you didn't want to see me so I figured I'd just stay out of your way."

Buffy looked over at Angel with anger boiling in the pit of her stomach. "You told him what?" Buffy narrowed her eyes.

Angel just stared at her with his mouth opening and closing, unable to form words.

"You son of a bitch!" Buffy yelled, extending her arm back, swinging it forward and hitting Angel across the face with all her might, sending him flying into the weapons chest in the back of the room.

Angel landed with a grunt of intense pain. When he looked up, he saw Buffy with a remaining scowl and Spike with a smirk of satisfaction.

Buffy walked up to a now bleeding Angel with dangerous violence and betrayal in her eyes.

"How could you do that to me? How could you keep something like this from me? I trusted you!"

"Buffy, I thought I was doing what was best for you." Angel stood up, wiping the blood from his mouth.

"What was best for me?" She asked incredulously. "Why can't anyone ever let me decide what's best for me? Did you actually think you were doing me a favor? Did you actually think I would never find out? Or is there something else you're not telling me?"

Angel looked down and took a step toward Buffy. Spike waited in the wings and watched the battle unfold, not entirely sure what to do.

"Ok. Maybe there were some selfish reasons behind me not telling you." Angel admitted, still not looking at her face.

"Such as?" Buffy waited, desperately trying to hang on to the tiny bit of patience she had left.

"The last time I saw you, you spoke of the future and not being ready to choose that one person you wanted to be with. You said you weren't ready."

"Yeah, go on." Buffy wondered where he was going with this.

"I couldn't help but try and convince myself that I was what you needed. But I knew there were so many things I couldn't give you. I guess I just got scared. When Spike came back, I realized that he could give you all the things I couldn't. He has everything that should have been mine." Angel sighed and clenched his teeth at the realization that he was admitting all these things with Spike just 15 feet away.

"Angel, what are you saying? You aren't making sense."

Angel finally looked up at her, glanced over at Spike who was still patiently staying out of the way, then looked at Buffy again, making eye contact.

"Buffy." Angel sighed. "Spike came back human."

Buffy jumped a little as if she were stung. She tried to let the information sink in but still couldn't bring herself to face Spike.

Buffy's hands started to shake. "Oh boy. I think I need to sit down."

To Be Continued..

Additional Note: Thanks so much Angelic and Magui for your messages. I'm thrilled that you like it!!

[Angelic]

More please! My god! *in a singsongy voice* Angel is jealous! Angel is jealous! Angel is jealous! lol!

Okay you should have been here a month ago! You would've won the Storyteller Award instead of me! I'm really not that great at all! But you...well

MORE! MORE! MORE!

[Weeza]

Buffy walked over to the nearest available seat with shaky legs. She sat down and grabbed the edges of her chair with tight fists that turned her knuckles white. Still too nervous to turn around and look at Spike, she kept her eyes on Angel and waited for him to say something more. Much to Buffy's disappointment, he remained silent.

"Um, could you repeat that last part again?" Buffy asked, her eyes still on Angel.

"You mean the part about Spike coming back human?" Angel questioned.

"Yeah, that's the part. Just wanted to make sure I wasn't hallucinating." She chuckled nervously.

Spike finally came into view and Buffy forced herself to look up at him. She met his gaze but it was way too intense for her and the eye contact only lasted about three seconds. Continuing to clutch onto her chair, her eyes were now scanning the floor like it was the most interesting thing in the world. Every bit of muscle strength she had was holding on to that chair in the most painful way. Sharp Pain was now shooting up her arms from the amount of anxiety that was flowing through her.

"I'm sorry Buffy." Angel spoke once again. "I should have told you. It was stupid of me to try and hide this from you."

"Yes. It was." Buffy replied coldly.

Angel frowned and sighed. He hated having Buffy this angry with him. Being on her bad side was not a place anyone wanted to be.

"I'm gonna take off for a while. I'll leave you guys to talk." Angel walked toward the door, but before he walked through it cast one last glance at Buffy. "I am sorry, Buffy. Please don't hate me." With that Angel walked out the door and left Spike and Buffy in an uncomfortable silence.

Buffy's gaze remained on the floor beneath her feet. After thirty painfully quiet seconds, Spike sat down next to her but much to his disappointment, she still wouldn't look at him. He just observed her for a few minutes hoping that she would say something and break this overwhelming feeling of nervousness.

"I swear, I thought you knew." Spike decided to speak first and break the silence. "The first thing I wanted to do was come look for you, but the grand poof wouldn't let me. He said it was too dangerous and that I should stick around here so they could find out why I came back."

"Please don't be angry." Spike continued. "If I knew what was really going on, I would have told that wanker to shove it and done everything I possibly could to find you."

Buffy still wouldn't acknowledge him. She kept her head down and this was frustrating Spike to no end. He feels like he's been waiting forever to see her again and he wasn't about to spend his time with her like this.

"Buffy, would you at least look at me?" Spike didn't hide the anger in his voice.

She finally glanced up at him with glistening eyes. Her chin trembled and Spike's brow furrowed in slight confusion. A lone tear fell down her cheek but before he could reach up and wipe it away, she leaned forward and wrapped her arms around him in a hug that was almost painful because of the amount of strength she put into it.

Buffy started lightly sobbing in Spike's arms. He lifted his hand to the back of her head and started stroking her hair. He closed his eyes and savored the moment of being able to hold her once again.

She pulled away from him and they locked eyes. Her face was flushed from crying and her eyes were now slightly red and swollen. She placed a hand on his cheek and continued to look into his eyes.

"You're warm." Buffy smiled.

It was so strange to feel warmth on his skin but being this close was helping the information sink in. Spike was really human.

Buffy leaned forward and placed her head on his chest. She stayed in that position for several minutes just to hear his heart beating. She just couldn't seem to tear herself away.

Spike looked down and witnessed an unusually content look on her face as she continued to listen to his beating heart. The sound was calming to her and feeling his chest rise and fall in sync with his breathing gave her the most amazing feeling of bliss. For the first time since Spike had known her, she had actually looked happy and it was all because of him.

He never thought it would be possible for him to ever make her feel that way. The feeling was overwhelming and tears began to cloud his eyes. He tried his hardest to hold them back but couldn't stop them from falling.

A tear of Spike's fell down his cheek and landed on Buffy's which still lay against his chest. She finally pulled away and looked up at him. Both of their hearts were racing.

"God, I missed you." Spike said with tearful eyes and bent forward to place a soft kiss on her forehead.

"I can't believe this is happening. I can't believe you are really here." Buffy said with closed eyes and a smile. "I'm so afraid that when I open my eyes I'm going to discover that this is just another dream."

"Open them and find out." Spike said in his usual low sexy voice that always seemed to give Buffy chills.

She opened her eyes and he was still seated in front of her. He fears were laid to rest. He was really there.

"How did this happen?" Buffy finally questioned, dying to know how he once again entered into her life.

"To make a long story short, it was the Powers That Be that brought me back. They had this bloody crazy idea that I could still be of some use around here."

"It's not so crazy." Buffy continued to stare at him in awe. "But you are going to have to be really careful now that you are human. There are a lot less demons and vampires around now thanks to you but being human is something that is gonna take some getting used to."

"You don't have to worry about me, slayer. I can hold my own. When the Powers brought me back, they kind of made me to their liking."

"What does that mean?"

"Well, they knew I wouldn't be much help to the world if I were just your average human that fought like a pansy. So they let me keep my vampire strengths. All of my senses are still enhanced like those of a vampire. My sense of smell and sight are stronger than ever. I'm exactly the same as I was except I can no longer shift into demon face and I can't be killed like a regular vampire. However, on the downside, I can be killed like a regular human. But I can still kick some major ass and that's what counts right?" Spike smirked and Buffy suddenly realized how much she missed his cocky smile.

"Spike, this is amazing."

"It's still strange though. I don't know what the bloody hell they were thinking bringing me back." Spike sighed.

"I'm glad they did." Buffy admitted with a tender smile and at that moment Spike was glad too.

Angel walked in the door interrupting their wonderful moment together. Spike sighed and rolled his eyes wishing Angel would have had the sense to stay away a little longer.

"So, you guys work things out?" Angel asked.

"Yeah, everything's good." Buffy answered with her eyes still on Spike.

"Good." Angel said with a huge ball of jealousy forming in his gut.

As he observed the two of them sitting on the couch together unable to take their eyes off of each other, he finally realized how close they really were. He knew there was something between them from what Buffy had said the last time he saw her but he had pushed it into the back of his mind where he hoped he'd never have to think about it again. Now he had to see it with his own eyes and there was no denying it anymore. They definitely had a connection.

Buffy stood up and faced Angel. She was still furious and he could see that anger still evident on her face.

"Well, I guess we should get going now." Buffy said to Angel with a smirk of her own.

"We? What do you mean we?"

"I mean Spike and I. He's coming home with me."

Spike's eyes widened as he heard this. He was shocked and instantly relieved. If he had to spend one more day with Angel he would surely have the urge to jump off this building.

"I don't think that's such a good idea Buffy. He hasn't been back that long. There's a lot he still has to get used to." Angel argued.

"Don't you dare fight me on this." Buffy scowled. "I will help Spike with anything he needs. He doesn't belong here. All you have him doing is meaningless chores anyway. Have you even trained with him at all to build up his strength since he's been back?"

Angel just looked down and remained silent. That was all the answer she needed.

"That's what I thought." She said in a huff. "We'll be going now." She looked over at Spike and waited for him to join her. He rose quickly and stood by her side. "Come on Spike. Let's go home. Angel can ship your stuff to my apartment. Isn't that right Angel?"

"Yeah, of course." Angel answered with a hundred emotions boiling in the pit of his stomach all at once.

Spike and Buffy headed for the door. Spike stopped Buffy with a slight touch on her arm.

"Hang on one minute luv." Buffy nodded.

He sauntered over to Angel and stood about a foot in front of him. Angel looked at him with pure hate in his eyes.

Spike loved how much this was killing Angel. He deserved it after all he'd put him through. There was just one thing he had to say before he left with Buffy.

"Oh yeah, before I forget...." Spike punched Angel sending him flying into the same weapons chest Buffy had punched him into earlier.

As Angel landed in a defeated lump on the floor, he watched as Spike made his way back to Buffy and they left the hotel hand in hand.

To Be Continued....

[Angelic]

:) Wow! Cool! MORE MORE!

[Hero]

Not a big spuffy fan either, but it's still a really good story. I think you should continue.

[slayerangel]

Weeza, you're a great writer, but this is too much Spuffy for me... keep it up.

[Weeza]

"You don't have to do this, ya know." Spike said looking over at Buffy in the driver's seat.

"Do what?" Buffy questioned.

"Take me under your wing again."

"I couldn't leave you there with Angel."

Spike sighed. "Yeah but I don't think I could take you feeling sorry for me again. I don't want you to feel like you have to take care of me."

"Spike, please stop questioning my motives. I want to help you. I'm not taking you home with me because I pity you. I'm taking you home with me because I care for you."

This bout of honesty made an uncomfortable silence fall between them. Spike couldn't help but be touched by her words. No matter how many things changed between them, he just could never bring himself to accept the fact that Buffy no longer hated him.

"So, where do you live now?" Spike broke the uneasy tension with a question.

"Uh, I live in an apartment with Willow, Xander and Dawn."

"Oh. Look, Buffy, I just need your help in finding a place to stay. It sounds pretty crowded at your place as it is. I don't wanna get in the way."

Buffy let out an aggravated growl and quickly pulled off to the side of the road.

"What are you doing?" Spike said, turning in his seat to face Buffy.

Buffy turned toward him as well. "I want you to stop this."

"Stop what?"

"This whole idea that you are some kind of a burden to me. Stop questioning everything I do and say and just let me help you! Please?"

Spike stepped out of the car and walked along the gravel stretch along side the highway. Buffy walked quickly to try and catch up.

"Where do you think you're going?" Buffy asked angrily.

"I can't do this. I can't just go home with you and pretend like nothing happened. Everything's different now." Spike stopped walking and faced Buffy.

"You're right. A lot has changed but we'll deal with it. You are human now and you are gonna have to adjust to that. The Powers may have let you keep your advantages and strengths but you haven't been training. You are out of practice and that's something you need to work on. So would you please just swallow your pride and let me help you!"

"I don't need you protecting me, Slayer."

As if on cue, a green and scaly demon with sharp claws interrupted their argument. It appeared behind Spike and he was completely oblivious to it. Buffy's eyes widened as the demon lowered a razor sharp appendage toward him. Spike saw the look on her face and started to turn around and as he did so, the demon sliced into his right upper arm.

Spike fell to the ground, clutching his wound. He tried his hardest to apply enough pressure to stop the bleeding but it wasn't quite enough and blood trickled down his hand onto the gravel below.

The sounds of fighting filled Spike's ears. He knew that Buffy was in a battle with the demon that had injured him but he couldn't take his eyes away from the blood that was pooling beneath him. He knew she could take care of herself and he wasn't in any position to help her out anyway. He'd just be in the way. For the first time since he came back, a realization had suddenly hit him like a ton of bricks. He was going to die. Someday he would die and if he didn't start training to keep up his strength, someday was going to be sooner than he'd like.

A loud cracking sound had pierced the air and Spike looked up at his slayer to see that familiar look she had on her face every time she defeated a demon. That look only lasted a few seconds before Buffy turned to Spike and crouched down before him to make sure he was ok. She gently looked into his eyes before grabbing his arm and putting pressure on his wound. The amount of blood that was oozing from him startled her. Her chin trembled slightly as she thought about losing him during the fight against The First. This wasn't nearly as serious but a harsh truth has wormed its way into her brain as she looked at all his blood. He was going to die and next time it would be forever. The thought sickened her but at the same time it made her even more determined to help him whether he wanted it or not.

Buffy once again looked up into his eyes and she could see the fear that they held. She knew he had probably realized the same thing she had. Death was staring him in the face just like it did to every living thing that dared to take a breath.

By the look in her eyes, he knew that she would do everything in her power to prevent that mortal fate, but more importantly, he would let her.

To Be Continued..

[Hero]

Sounds like some Buffy talking to Robin stuff, lol. It's still really good. Keep going.

[Magui]

Keep posting please

[Weeza]

Spike sat on the edge of the couch and watched Buffy as she sat beside him and dressed his wounds. She cleaned him up and bandaged him in silence only looking up at him when she wanted to make sure that she wasn't wrapping his arm up too tightly. She wanted to be sure she wasn't hurting him in any way.

Her mind started to drift about hurting him in the past. First physically, then emotionally. She continued to look downward at his wound but lifted her eyes up so she could stare at him without being too obvious. When she looked at him now she didn't see the same person that threatened to kill her and almost did on parent-teacher night during high school. She thought back to how she felt about him then and almost couldn't remember. There was not one shred of hate left in her toward him. She remembered when the thought of him made her so mad that she would use that when it came time to fight because it gave her more energy.

She thought back to when she found out about his crush on her and she went totally ballistic. Remembering the hurt look on his face when she tried to tell him that there was nothing between them made her heart hurt. How could she have been so totally wrong about him? When he had kept the fact that Dawn was the key from Glory, she saw a whole other side to him. He sat there bruised and battered and almost got himself killed simply because he couldn't bear to see her hurt if anything ever happened to Dawn. She had never wanted to kiss anyone as badly as she did at that moment. He had done something so noble for her and it had touched her more than anyone would ever know. She never regretted that kiss for one single second.

There were however, other kisses that she remembers regretting. She felt like she was a bad person for developing feelings for a soulless demon but he had been so sweet to her no matter how bad she treated him. Everything went to hell after that but no matter what happened she could never forget what it felt like whenever they had sex. Her mind would disappear into a world of complete bliss. She could feel nothing but his hands upon her and her racing heart as he brushed his lips over every part of her body.

Buffy suddenly felt her face flush and she hoped that Spike didn't notice. She looked up at him and smiled as she finished up with the bandages. She let go of his sore arm and patted his jean-clad knee.

"All better." She said and rose from her seat.

He grabbed her hand before she got the chance to walk away from him.

"Thanks, Buffy." He said with appreciation.

She squeezed his hand and smiled. He released his grip on her and she walked into the kitchen just as the teakettle started whistling. She took it off the stove and poured the steaming water into two mugs that sat on the island. She took out packets of hot chocolate mix and a bag of mini marshmallows and made the drink she promised her mother she would make for him in her dream.

Realizing what she was making, Spike stood up and made his way over to the kitchen and sat on a stool across from her. She gently placed a mug full of hot chocolate in front of him. He saw the tower of mini marshmallows settled on top of the warm liquid and smiled.

"I promised my mom I would make this for you." Buffy smiled.

"You did? And when was that, luv."

"The other night. In my dream."

"So, you're telling me your mother came to you in a dream just to tell you to make me some hot chocolate?" He looked confused.

"I've been having these dreams. That's how I knew you were still alive. Each dream gave me hints on how to find you. I was beginning to think that I was just dreaming what I wanted to see. I was so scared that I might never find you." Buffy admitted with a trembling chin.

Tears rolled down her cheeks and Spike immediately went to her and wrapped his arms around her. She held on to him tightly and tucked her head under his chin.

Seeing her cry gave him mixed feelings. He hated to see her like this but at the same time, her reaction to his return touched him deeply. He never thought in all the time he has spent on this earth that anyone would have ever been this happy to see him.

"You ok, pet?" Spike asked in a whisper.

"I am now" Buffy smiled.

Spike leaned forward and placed his lips on her brow. She closed her eyes and drowned in the warmth of his lips. Warmth. That is something she wasn't exactly sure she'd ever get used to. She never would have guessed in a million years that the man standing before her would end up with a warm body, a heartbeat and a soul. The soul was shocking enough but this was beyond her wildest dreams. She felt like she wanted to hold him forever and never let him go.

He pulled away from her and the loss she felt almost made her start crying again. They sat back down on the kitchen stools to finish their cups of hot chocolate before they got cold.

"Uh, we should really get started on training tomorrow. I've found I can hold my own in a fight against psycho but human ex-boyfriends but when it comes to demons, I've never felt so weak."

"Not to worry." Buffy said. "We'll have you back to your old big bad fighting self in no time. I promise."

"I really appreciate this, Buffy."

She reached her hand across the table and held onto this hand. She couldn't stop staring at him. At that moment she realized how Spike must have felt when she had been brought back. She remembered seeing the tender look on his face the first time he saw her. He automatically assumed that she was the buffybot. Why wouldn't he? The chances of something like that happening once was beyond the realm of reality but for it to happen twice was almost unimaginable. For that reason, she stared intently at him with complete fear that she will suddenly wake up and the moment will be over.

"Buffy? Are you sure you're ok?" He asked after noticing her staring at him.

"Yeah. Sorry. I know I'm staring but I just need to make sure you're really here."

"This isn't another nightmare, Buffy. I really am here."

"They weren't nightmares. A dream with you in it could never be a nightmare." Buffy admitted softly.

Spike blushed slightly. It was a vision Buffy was surprised to see. The slight redness on his cheeks made him look boyish and vulnerable.

"It's been a long day." Buffy said, interrupting his embarrassed expression. "We should get some sleep. We've got a lot of work to do tomorrow."

"Right. Just point me to the way of the sofa and I'll be out like a light in no time." Spike grinned.

"Uh, I was kind of hoping that you'd stay in my room tonight." Now it was Buffy's turn to look embarrassed. "When I realized you might still be alive, one of the first things I thought of were those nights we spent just holding each other. I can't even begin to tell you how much I've missed that."

"Lead the way." Spike said, his eyes glistening with unshed tears.

Buffy stood and held her hand out to him. He took it and entwined their fingers as they made their way to the bedroom.

"I see you finally got rid of those New Kids On The Block posters." Spike chuckled as he looked around her new bedroom.

"Yeah, well I remembered how nice you decorated your crypt and I opted for a more sophisticated look." She took his hand and led him over to the bed.

She saw how his eyes had been fluttering closed and she knew he was just as exhausted as she was. Neither of them wanted to even bother changing out of their clothes. They lay upon the bed and wrapped their arms around each other. She felt like he was still too far away, so she moved as close as she could to him. They finally felt at peace when their arms were tightly snug around each other's backs and their legs comfortably entwined.

He could feel her warm breath on his neck and she could feel his. She slightly pulled back and settled her forehead on his and looked deeply into his eyes. Her lips find his in a gentle and sweetly soft bedtime kiss. After pulling away, he made the move this time and kissed her again just as softly has she had kissed him.

"Goodnight, Buffy."

"Goodnight, Spike"

With that, they fell asleep together silently wishing that there would be a thousand more nights exactly like this one.

To Be Continued.....

[Magui]

grrr,spuffy!,..no,j/k,..I like the story,it is very good,you are a great writer,keep posting!!

[Weeza]

Dawn and Willow stood in the doorway to Buffy's bedroom watching her and Spike sleep. They were cuddled together, their arms and legs entwined and they looked completely peaceful and content.

"They look so sweet!" Dawn said, continuing to watch them.

"They really do." Willow agreed.

Dawn's head tilted when Buffy's body shifted slightly and her arm slid further up Spike's back and her head became tucked under his chin.

"Did you see that?" Dawn said tugging on Willow's shirtsleeve. "They are so cute!"

"I agree but don't you think we should leave them alone now? I don't think they would be too happy if they woke up and found us staring at them."

"I guess you're right." Dawn agreed.

They both meant to move out of the doorframe and find something more productive to do but they just couldn't seem to get their legs to work. Even though they both agreed to stop with the staring, they couldn't bring their eyes away from the touching scene in front of them.

Buffy stirred and her eyes opened. She looked over at Spike's sleeping form and smiled sweetly. She hadn't yet noticed the audience of two watching their slumber like it was some great romantic drama. Buffy studied his face and ran a gentle hand through the curly platinum locks on his head, which were disheveled from sleep.

Dawn sighed happily at the gesture and at the sound Buffy turned her head to see Dawn and Willow staring at her in awe.

She knew she should have been mad at the interruption of a private moment but instead she grinned. Nothing could bring her down now that she finally found the person she was hoping for but never actually believed she'd ever see again.

"Sorry, Buffy." Willow said immediately. "We just saw you all comfy and cuddled and we couldn't tear ourselves away." She added, slightly shame faced.

"It's ok. Why don't you guys come on in?" Buffy said.

Slightly surprised, Willow and Dawn entered the room and stood beside Buffy's side of the bed. All three girls looked at Spike as if he were a newborn baby taking a nap, waiting to see the next move he would make.

Spike suddenly opened his eyes to three pairs of female ones watching him intently.

"Uh, why is everyone looking at me?" Spike asked.

"Because you're so adorable when you sleep." Buffy answered.

"I thought I was adorable all the time." He pouted. "But if it means that much to you, carry on then." With that he closed his eyes once more and the three girls continued watching him, much to his surprise.

When he heard them all sigh he opened his eyes again. He glared at the girls, rolled his eyes and got up out of bed. That followed by three female groans of disappointment.

"Show's over ladies. There will be another showing tonight at bedtime." He walked out the door and headed to the bathroom to take a shower.

"Buffy, this is so great!" Dawn yelped.

"Yeah, I'm amazed." Willow added. "I can't believe you actually found him.

Buffy looked at them both with a huge grin plastered across her face.

"I know! I can't stop smiling!" Buffy said, not remembering when she ever felt this happy.

"You guys are never gonna believe this." Buffy continued. "Spike is human now! He can still fight with vampire strength and speed, although he does need a bit of practice, but he's human!"

"Oh my God!" Dawn and Willow chorused together.

"You mean he can go out in the sun now? His cross and holy water allergies are over?" Dawn asked brightly.

"Absolutely." Buffy confirmed.

"How did this happen?" Willow inquired.

"Apparently, the Powers That Be thought that he would be of some great use here and that leaving him dead was such a waste. They believe that he can do great things to help the universe. I just wish that someone would have informed me of that decision so I could have had him back a long time ago." Buffy grinned sheepishly.

"Wow!" Dawn squealed. "Wow! I'm gonna go make him breakfast. He's probably starving! What do you think he likes? Eggs? Pancakes? Waffles? What should I make?"

"I'm sure he'll love whatever you make him, Dawn." Buffy said.

"Ok!" Dawn left, practically skipping out the door to make Spike some food.

"Do ya think she's excited?" Willow asked, sarcastically.

Buffy chuckled, then her expression turned serious.

Willow noticed the sudden mood change and became concerned. "Are you ok? Is something wrong?"

"No. It's just....I'm scared."

"Of what?"

"Everything is going so well. I've never been happier. I'm afraid it's all going to end or that it's going to be taken away."

"Don't think like that, Buffy. The man that you love is back in your life. It's like some kind of miracle. Don't ruin it for your self by thinking you are going to lose him again." Willow thought for a moment. "Speaking of which, have you told him yet?"

"Told him what?" Buffy asked, bewildered.

"That you love him, of course. Isn't that the one thing that was bothering you the most? You said he didn't believe you when you told him the first time. You wanted to make sure that he knew the truth."

"No. I haven't told him yet." Buffy admitted softly.

"What are you waiting for?"

"I don't know. I guess I'm just nervous."

"Buy why? You already know how much he loves you. It's not like you could have some big fear of rejection or anything because you already know exactly how he feels about you. Just tell him. You have a second chance to make it right. Don't wait too long this time."

"I'll tell him. I promise. I just need a little more time. Things are weird right now. He has to adjust to his new life and I don't want to make things worse by moving too fast."

"Ok, Buffy." Willow sighed in disappointment. "But you never know what tomorrow may bring. You better let him know how you feel before it's too late."

A few hours later, Buffy dragged Spike into the training room. They set a room aside that was set up with a punching bag and some work out mats. It was no where near the size of her old one but it served its purpose.

"All right, show me what you got." Buffy said, immediately getting into a fighting stance.

Spike nodded and advanced on her. He started by throwing a few punches, which she easily blocked.

"Come on, Spike! You can do better than that!" She taunted him, trying to get him to fight harder.

He threw another punch that she blocked just as easily then crouched down and tried to kick her legs out from under her. She jumped over the incoming leg and when he stood up she copied his move. Unlike him, she made contact sending him sprawling to the floor where he landed on his rear.

"Spike, you have got to try harder!" Buffy said with irritation.

Spike continued to sit on the floor and look defeated, his head and shoulders slumped toward the floor.

"I can't. I can't do this. I'm not strong enough anymore."

"That's nonsense and you know it. When we were at the Angel's hotel, I saw you punch him across the room. The strength is there. You just have to find it."

"I don't know how."

"Of course you do! You've always known. You can't just forget something like that. You were one of the greatest fighters I've ever known. You can't give up now."

Spike continued to look at the floor as if he was too tired to even argue. He appeared to have given up completely.

Buffy crouched down in front of him and grabbed his hand.

"Spike look at me." He finally raised his eyes. "I know what this is, Spike. You're not weak, you're scared. The only thing that is stopping you is fear. I know you have the ability to fight just as well as you used to but you are afraid because you know you are vulnerable now. You are human and very capable of getting hurt but if you don't try and build up your strength, you will get hurt and I can't bare to lose you again."

Touched by her words, a lone tear fell down his cheek but he still made no move to stand up and try again.

"Spike, I need my partner in crime back. We fought so well together. I need you by my side. What happens if I get into a situation that I can't get out of? What if a demon gets the best of me and I have no way out? Are you going to be satisfied standing in the sidelines helplessly and watching me fight? That's not you. That will never be you."

Spike suddenly stood looking determined. "I will never let anyone hurt you."

"I know." Buffy smiled sweetly. "Now please, let's try this again. Give me everything you've got and more. Show me what you would do to anyone that tried to hurt me."

Spike nodded and immediately threw a punch that Buffy just barely blocked. His fists flew furiously and it was almost impossible to keep up with him and block all of his punches. His fist connected with her shoulder and she stumbled back. He sent a back kick to her abdomen and she was knocked down onto the floor mats. She landed with an oomph.

Spike knelt down beside her, looking concerned. "I'm so sorry, Buffy. Did I hurt you?" He asked, looking her over.

Buffy smiled the brightest of smiles. "You did it!" She leaned forward and wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him in for a hard kiss on his soft lips.

She pulled away, suddenly realized what she had just done. It seemed so natural to pull him into a kiss. They shared some soft kisses last night but this one made her feel the passion that she had missed terribly by not having him around.

They locked eyes and a sudden seriousness swept across both their faces. They leaned into one another until they could feel each other's breath on their lips. The sound of a throat clearing filled their ears and they simultaneously turned to the offending noise.

"Am I interrupting something?" The visitor said in a harsh voice.

Buffy glared in shock and anger. "Angel?"

To Be Continued...

[Weeza]

"Angel, what the hell are you doing here?" Buffy asked, irritated that he had interrupted her almost kiss with Spike.

"It's nice to see you too, Buffy." Angel glanced from Buffy to Spike with a none-to-pleased facial expression. "I thought I would drop off Spike's things instead of mailing them. It seemed so impersonal."

"I don't think you being here is such a good idea." Buffy said.

"I didn't come here to fight with you, Buffy. I just wanted to see how things were going and to make sure everything was ok. I also hoped I could talk to you alone for a little while."

"Why?" Spike asked before Buffy could respond. "So you can beg her forgiveness for betraying her or so you can try to convince her that she's dumb for trying to help me?"

"Well, a little bit of both actually." Angel admitted.

Buffy walked up to Spike and gently placed her hands on his chest. "It's ok, Spike. I really do need to talk to him. It'll be fine."

Spike looked over at Angel to see that smug smile on his face that he always had whenever he felt like he had won. He glanced back over at Buffy and rolled his eyes. "Fine. Have your little reunion or whatever. Just leave me out of it."

Spike was angry and she knew it but there was no time to explain or reassure him right then. She had to deal with Angel first. She knew she would have to tell Spike how she felt about him soon. It didn't seem like he was about to take her indecisiveness any longer by the way he just stormed out of the room and slammed the door.

Buffy sighed deeply. "This better be good, Angel."

He walked over to her and smiled uncomfortably. "I'm sorry."

She waited for him to say more but he did nothing but stare at her.

"You're sorry." Buffy repeated. "Is that it? That's all you have to say?"

"What else can I say? I already explained why I did what I did. I thought you would understand."

"Understand? Angel, you weren't there. You didn't see how my relationship evolved with Spike. You were off in L.A. fighting your own battles. You have a lot of nerve coming back here."

"You're right. I wasn't there but I know Spike. I know Spike better than you do."

"Are you sure about that?" Buffy shot back. "You know one side of him. I know every side of him."

A look of disgust crossed Angel's face. "You only think you know him. I saw all the evil things he did. He's not worthy of you."

"And you are?" Buffy asked incredulously. "What makes you think that you have risen above everything in your past? What makes you think that you are better than he is? You've done just as many terrible things in your past and then some but you somehow have this idea that he's beneath you!"

"He IS beneath me."

"Angel, you make me sick sometimes, you know that? I don't know exactly when you let your ego get the best of you but let me tell you right now, get over it. I will not stand here and listen to you try and tell me that you are superior. He has always stood by my side. He has always watched my back. You haven't. You left because you couldn't handle the fact that you had a soul cursed upon you. You couldn't handle the fact that you were unable to get all bump and grindy with me in fear of losing a soul you seem to have so much resentment for. Spike, on the other hand, went out to get a soul on his own. He chose to have one. He was tired of being evil and hunting and killing. He wanted to be good."

"He wanted to get into your pants." Angel seethed. "That's why he wanted a soul. You give him too much credit."

"I may have been a huge factor in his decision to get a soul but it wasn't for sex. If you think that, then you really don't know him anywhere near as much as you think you do. He wanted to be a better man for me. He wanted to be worthy enough for me to love him. He loved me so much that he couldn't bear not to be by my side. It didn't matter if I was yelling at him, punching him or kissing him as long as I was with him. I threw him out of my life once and I'm not prepared to do that again. So unless you can accept that, I suggest you leave now."

Angel let out a defeated sigh. "Obviously there is nothing I can say to make you change your mind, is there?"

"No." Buffy said matter-of-factly.

Angel nodded. "Ok. Just let me stay one night. I just want to make sure that everything is going right with him. I want to make sure you are safe."

"I don't know, Angel. That's a bad idea and entirely unnecessary."

"Please, just one night. Then I'll leave you alone and you never have to see or talk to me again if you don't want to."

"Fine. But Spike is gonna hate this."

"I hate this!" Spike yelled twenty minutes later after being told Angel was spending the night. "How can you agree to this? He'll probably stake me in my sleep."

"Calm down. This was the only way. He would have just kept bothering us otherwise. He promised to keep his distance if I agreed. Please don't be angry." Buffy pleaded.

Spike's face softened. He reached out and wrapped his arms around her. "I could never be angry at you." He placed a soft kiss on her forehead. "But I still don't like it. I think he's up to something."

"It'll be fine, I promise. Nothing will happen to you. I will be by your side all night long and I'll have a weapon near me at all times if that will make you feel better."

"Ok. It's a deal, but no stakes. I don't want you having nightmares of demons and things that go bump in the night and have you get all stake happy in your sleep. You'll wake up next to a big pile of dust."

Buffy looked at him questionably. "Spike, you can't be dusted anymore remember? You are all human now with the warm blood and the heartbeat." She said and placed a hand over his heart so she could feel it beat again.

"Oh yeah." Spike replied sheepishly and lowered his head. "I keep forgetting. It's so weird. I've got this heart thumping in my chest and even that doesn't seem to be enough to remind me."

"Let me remind you." Buffy said, pulling his head down for a kiss.

Her lips brushed against his and he felt the pounding in his chest increase.

Her lips pushed harder against his and when they backed away from each other to breathe his heart practically leapt into his throat.

She opened her eyes to see an intense look of passion on his face. His lips were slightly parted and his chest heaved up and down trying to calm his practically bursting heart.

Taking this opportunity to deepen the kiss, she quickly lurched forward once again, attaching her lips to his but letting her tongue slip into the deep recesses of his mouth in the process.

He moaned gently at the feel of her tongue's enticing moistness as it circled his own. He reached his arms around her and tightened his grip.

Reaching her hand around the back of his neck, she pulled him even closer as she moaned softly in his mouth. Her remaining hand reached up the back of his shirt to caress the soft skin at the small of his back, all the while urging him to do the same.

At the feel of her warm hand against his skin, he pulled away and looked into her lust filled eyes. Lust filled. What if that's all it was? He couldn't handle sleeping with her just to have her move back into denial and make him feel like crap when she told him for the hundredth time that it didn't mean anything. He didn't want to ruin what they had again. Last time, it seemed like they had become friends but when they started sleeping together it all changed. If they weren't shagging then they were fighting. All the friendliness in their relationship had faded and that was the last thing he wanted to have happen.

"Buffy, I can't." He whispered, trying to catch his breath.

"What's wrong?"

"I just can't. I'm not ready. It's too fast." Spike avoided her eyes.

"It's alright. I understand." She said but couldn't hide the disappointment in her voice. "Why don't we just lay down."

They both changed into their nightclothes, neither embarrassed to get undressed in front of the other. There was so much history between them that they did it without even thinking and they were too flustered to even think about staring at the exposed skin that was suddenly available.

Walking over to the bed, they slipped between the cool cotton sheets and sighed at the comfort. She turned her head toward him and felt warmth overcome her. Not being able to help herself, she leaned over and kissed him on the lips once again, this time softly and with affection.

He couldn't remember ever being kissed by her like that. It was always hard and urgent to the point that he thought she would nibble his lip right off. Her gentleness made him feel more alive than anything had since he's been back.

He leaned forward; suddenly wanting to continue when the door to their room burst open and Angel came strolling in. He leapt onto the bed, not saying a word when he squeezed between them and joined them under the covers.

"Hey guys!" Angel finally greeted. "I thought we could watch a movie. Ya know, hang out before I make my final exit." Angel grabbed the remote and turned on the television, making a blue glow travel across the walls. "Anyone want some popcorn?"

Spike and Buffy groaned and simultaneously flipped onto their sides, facing away from him. Ignoring him, they tried to fall asleep, leaving him stretched out between them. Angel smirked, knowing that he had interrupted something as he continued to flip the channels on the bedroom television set.

To Be Continued...

[Weeza]

Buffy woke up half expecting Angel to still be there, hogging her bed. Even though she had at one time loved him, she couldn't wait for him to leave. Their relationship seemed as if it were a hundred years ago. So much has changed since then and she didn't like Angel acting like he still had some power over her. She loved Spike now, not him and couldn't imagine being away from him. Spike needed to know that she loved him but there have been so many distractions and interruptions that it had been next to impossible to talk to him about it. No matter how her actions have changed toward him, she knew he still needed to hear it be said. After the battle with the first, he didn't believe her when she said 'I love you' and she understood why. If she had been treated the way the she treated him during their sexual affair, she would have a hard time believing it too.

When she rolled over, however, Angel was thankfully gone and only Spike remained. She watched his peaceful face of slumber and his chest rising and falling as he breathed. Watching him sleep made her content beyond belief and she knew at that moment that she wanted to wake up like this every morning.

Her legs swooped over the side of the bed and she walked out into the living room to find Angel asleep on the couch. All she felt when she looked at him was annoyance and knowing that he couldn't leave until sunset made her realize how long this day was going to turn out to be. Never before has she looked so forward to losing the sun. She took one last glance at him and rolled her eyes. She secretly hoped that he would remain sleeping until he had to leave. It would make everything so much easier.

She walked into the training room and brought out the video camera that she had in the cabinet. She secretly set it up in the corner that captured the entire room the best. She wanted to start videotaping her and Spike's fighting sessions so that she could go over his moves with him and point out what he needed improvement on. She needed to make sure that his fighting skills were as sharp as ever, never wanting to take the chance of losing him ever again.

Meanwhile, back in Spike and Buffy's bedroom, Spike awoke to find Xander, Dawn and Willow sitting on the bed staring at him.

"Ya know, I keep waking up like this and it's starting to freak me out." Spike grumbled sleepily. He sat up and scooted himself upward so his back rested against the headboard. "What can I do for you?"

Willow spoke first "Well, we've all been really busy lately and haven't had the chance to give you a proper welcome."

"Does this welcome involve a weapon of some kind?" Spike raised an eyebrow.

"Of course not." Dawn said.

"I know that Willow and Nibblet are happy to have me here but I never expected a welcome from monkey boy." Spike grinned.

"And you're not gonna get one if you keep calling me that." Xander's non- patched eye narrowed.

"Right. Sorry about that, mate, but I wouldn't be me if I didn't give you a hard time."

"Don't I know it." Xander smiled. "Actually, I wanted to thank you."

Spike looked bewildered and suddenly had a loss for words.

"I was wrong about you." Xander continued. "I know about what you did for Buffy, what you did for ALL of us. You gave her and the rest of us the break we desperately needed. You gave Buffy the normal life that we never thought she would be able to have. I just want you to know that we have no problem with you being here."

"Thanks." Spike said thoughtfully. "It means a lot of me to be accepted by Buffy's friends."

"We do have one question though." Willow chimed in.

"What's that, luv?"

Willow's brow furrowed slightly. "What the hell is Angel doing sleeping on our couch?"

Spike groaned and covered his face with a pillow momentarily. After he removed it from his face he looked back at the gang who were waiting for an answer. "Damn! I almost forgot that the grand poof was even here. I was hoping it was just a nightmare. Angel's got himself convinced that Buffy is making a mistake by having me here. He said he would go peacefully if Buffy let him stay one night so he can make sure I wasn't going to hurt her. Stupid git. If there is anyone we should keep an eye on it's him, not me. But no worries, his undead ass will be out of here at sunset. As soon as the sun hits the hills, I'm kicking his giant forehead out the door."

"We are going to go out for a while to stay out of the line of fire. You are more than welcome to come with us." Willow offered.

"Thanks, luv, but I think I'll pass. There is no way I'm leaving him here alone with Buffy. I never trusted him and I never will."

The gang nodded in understanding and left the apartment for the day.

Later, Spike and Buffy left a still sleeping Angel on the sofa while they walked into the training room for a bit of sparring. She started to record their session but didn't tell Spike in fear of making him nervous. He had enough on his mind already without having to worry about his every fighting stance, punch and kick being caught on film.

As they started to fight, she noticed a sudden improvement, which she attributed to the fact that Angel was visiting. She could feel the pent up anger in his punches and knew he was most likely using his frustration to help improve his fighting.

When Angel showed up and stood in the doorway after waking, Spike's kicks became even fiercer when he noticed him standing there. The newly human man had to remind himself that he was fighting Buffy and to settle down a little before his violent tendencies got the better of him. He would much rather save his energy to beat Angel to a bloody pulp if the situation arose to do so.

Putting her hands up in a signal that she needed a break, Buffy grabbed a towel to wipe the sweat off her brow and handed one to Spike also. He looked at her funny at first and then gently wiped his forehead with his hand to find moistness there. He grabbed the towel and realized it was going to take him a long time to get used to being human and remember that he would now do things like sweat after a long workout. He realized he would have to start taking more showers now to avoid the pungent workout smell that was likely to develop.

"I'm going to go get us some bottled water and a snack. Angel, why don't you work with Spike for a little while until I get back."

Angel pushed himself away from the doorjamb with his shoulder. "No problem."

"My pleasure." Spike seethed.

Fear swept over her as she saw the competitive and equally confident expressions on their faces.

Her eyes widened. "Be good you two!" She warned. "I won't be long."

Buffy rushed into the kitchen not wanting to leave them unsupervised for a long period of time. She grabbed two bottled waters from the fridge and took out some meats and cheeses so she could make her and Spike sandwiches. Looking inside the fridge, she contemplated bringing Angel some blood but decided against it. She really didn't want him there and refused to cater to him like he was a welcomed guest.

She prepared their food as quickly as possible so she could get back to the training room before they could kill each other. She could have smacked herself for even suggesting that they get into a round of sparring together. As far as stupid ideas go, that has to have been one of the dumbest she's ever had.

She grabbed the water and the plates with the food and headed back to the training room. As she walked inside, she dropped everything she held in her hands when she saw Spike lying unconscious on the floor.

Kneeling down beside him, she placed her hand on his chest to assure herself that his heart was still beating. It was. Then she grazed her fingers across her temple before looking viciously at Angel.

"What the hell happened here?" Buffy said with a clenched jaw.

"I don't know." Angel said, with a concern that Buffy was starting to question in her mind. "We were fighting and all of a sudden he just stopped. He started getting all wobbly and then he just passed out on the floor. It happened right before you walked in. I was just about to come get you because I didn't know what to do."

Her eyes narrowed at him in disbelief. "Help me get him up and into bed."

Dragging Spike to the bed, Buffy continued to eye Angel suspiciously. They gently placed him onto the mattress and Buffy ordered Angel to get a wet washcloth.

When Angel came back with the moistened cloth, she began patting Spike's face with it, hoping that the coolness of the water would be enough to bring him back to consciousness.

She looked up at Angel who was watching her actions toward Spike with a blank stare.

"I swear to God." She said with as much venom as her voice could muster. "If I find out you had anything to do with this, I'll stake you myself."

To Be Continued....